The President of Frito-Lay, however, thanks you for sending him the little cockroach-embedded-in-corn-chip version of "Han Solo Frozen in Carbonite" he keeps on his desk surrounded by Star Wars action figures.Trial Lets Trouble Out Of Frito Bag
During discovery in the seven-year-old case, Frito-Lay turned over piles of complaints filed between 1991 and 1994, involving nearly all the company's products -- Fritos, Cheetos, Doritos, Lays, Grandma's Cookies, Rold Gold, Sunchips, Munchos, Smartfood, and assorted dips....In many cases, Frito-Lay tested the products that were returned. But consumers contacted by the Globe said they were never told the results -- even when the company confirmed the presence of toxins, foreign objects, or bugs.
This leaves Marquis DeSade Land, The Moulin Khmer-Rouge, and It's A Turkish Prison After All, as the only remaining amusement parks that reserve their right to issue soiled underwear to its workers.Disney Characters Win Right To Clean Underwear In Contract Talk
[Disney World, FL] Under terms of a tentative contract, the workers will be assigned individual undergarments, which they can take home each night to clean themselves instead of relying on Disney launderers....Some workers complained about receiving undergarments that were stained or smelled badly. There have been three cases of costumed workers at the Magic Kingdom getting either pubic lice or scabies during the past two years...
Ironically, the donor's heart became available after his spleen parked and detonated a truckload of fertilizer underneath his liver.Palestinian Heart Saves Life Of Dying Israeli
Geez, don't these repressive administrators remember what it's like being a kid? If they want to cut down sexually arousing dances, they shouldn't ban freaking. Instead they should reserve a couple of songs like "Get Ur Freak On" as Guys-in-front Freaking Only numbers. Let these girls find out how much their boyfriends respect them.Newest Teen Dance Is Freaking Out School Administrators
They are watching girls get down on all fours, groups of teens line up in pelvic conga lines and pairs go at it in what Richmond High Principal Haidee Foust-Whitmore calls "sex with their clothes on...." Some teachers say allowing youngsters to freak gives tacit approval to sexual activity at an early age, but others say they don't want to be the hormone police.
Talk about not letting go!Over 3 Million Chinese Drink Their Own Urine
[Beijing] Participants at a recent seminar on the practice in the northeastern city of Shenyang were told that urine contains many active ingredients which strengthen the immune system, Xinhua said. "Urine contains no bacterium and is more sanitary than blood..."
Colombian Police Nab Breast-Temptress Thieves
[Bogota] Three young Colombian women preyed on men by smearing their breasts with a powerful drug and luring the victims into taking a lick, before making off with their wallets and cars, police said on Friday.
"Excuse me, sir, but I need an adult, middle-class to upper middle-class male stranger to briefly dampen my insecurities by admiring my young, supple body. Would you please stop your car engine and accommodate me?""Why, yes, as long as my generous wallet stays in my right, back trouser pocket, slutty- young- woman- who- I- may- never- see- again- after- today, I am free to suppress my judgment, let you in my car, and trust you to not take advantage of my vulnerable state of arousal. How may I help you?"
"Please allow me to gratify you by mashing my ample bosom into your open, salivating mouth."
"Why, yes, of course. Just like those spontaneous sexual encounters documented in 'Penthouse Forum.' The kind every heterosexual man is entitled to."
"Tee hee!"
"You're welcome."