How Not To Fly (about)

'Wife Wanted' Sign Nets Man First Date In 8 Years

[Cedar Springs, MI] But after hearing from about 60 women and going out with three, the 53-year-old says all he's looking for now is a second date with one. So the sign has come down.... "It's a bizarre way to meet somebody," Horowitz said, "but I never would have met this woman otherwise."

Eunuchs Of India Demand Their Rights

[Varanasi, India] Thousands of eunuchs ended a weeklong congregation in this temple city on Sunday, demanding greater access to jobs in universities and government.

Super-SUV Makes Splash In Bay Area

General Motors is selling as many of the $50,000 H2s [Hummer 2] as it can make... Since introducing the model in July, GM has sold more than 15,000 of the H2s....

[A Mill Valley resident] loves the macho frame and 316 horsepower V8 engine. And she doesn't seem to mind that, on average, her vehicle gets 10 miles to the gallon...

California H2 dealer: "Eighty percent of my clients are Marin couples with families."

Critics Question Changes On U.S. Health Web Sites

The Danish research, praised by the American Cancer Society as "the largest, and probably the most reliable, study of [cancer risk from abortion]," is not mentioned in the government's recent posting [as it was previously.] Dorie Hightower, a media officer at the [National Cancer Institute], attributed the revision to the institute's periodic review of fact sheets "for accuracy and scientific relevance." Asked whether the institute now thought that the Danish study failed on either count, Hightower said no.

As for the CDC's fact sheet on condoms, the old version focused on the advantages of using them, but the new version puts more emphasis on the risk that such use may not prevent sexually transmitted diseases, and on the advantages of abstinence.

China Closes 3,300 Internet Cafes

[Beijing] China has shut more than 3,300 Internet cafes for safety reasons after a fire tore through an underground Beijing cafe in June killing 25 people and injuring 12 others, the official Xinhua news agency reported Friday.

Researchers Grow Tiny Kidneys In Mice

Israeli scientists have grown a miniature human kidney inside a mouse using a technique that could one day mean an end to organ transplants. Although the kidney was tiny, it was functional, suggesting that patients suffering from organ failure might be able to grow replacements. Nearly 80,000 Americans are waiting for kidney transplants, according to the National Kidney Foundation.

Man Jailed For Smuggling Monkeys In Pants

[Los Angeles] "It became non-routine when [customs agents] opened his luggage and a bird of paradise took off flying in the terminal," [prosecutor] Johns said.... Asked by agents if he had anything else to tell them, Cusack responded: "Yes, I've got monkeys in my pants."

...the monkeys are listed as a threatened and endangered species in the United States...

6-Year-Old Tape From Enron Company Party Has Parallels To Scandal; Exec Joked About Accounting

At the [going-away party for former Enron President Rich Kinder], then-Texas Gov. George W. Bush pleaded with Kinder: "Don't leave Texas. You're too good a man." And his father, former President Bush, told Kinder, "You have been fantastic to the Bush family. I don't think anybody did more than you did to support George...."

In one skit, former administrative executive Peggy Menchaca played the part of Kinder receiving a budget report from then-President Jeff Skilling, who played himself. When the pretend Kinder expressed doubt that Skilling could pull off 600 percent revenue growth for the coming year, Skilling described how it could be done. "We're going to move from mark-to-market accounting to something I call HFV, or hypothetical future value accounting," Skilling joked as he read from a script. "If we do that, we can add a kazillion dollars to the bottom line."

Skilling abruptly resigned from Enron in August 2001 before news of its troubles surfaced, and has professed ignorance about much of what went on under his watch.

Bush Says Lott Was Right to Apologize

• Recent comments by Senator Lott do not reflect the spirit of our country... He has apologized, and rightly so. Every day our nation was segregated was a day that America was unfaithful to our founding ideals. And the founding ideals of our nation and, in fact, the founding ideals of the political party I represent was, and remains today, the equal dignity and equal rights of every American.
• This great and prosperous land must become a single nation of justice and opportunity. We must continue our advance toward full equality for every citizen, which demands the guarantee of civil rights for all. Any suggestion that the segregated past was acceptable or positive is offensive, and it is wrong.
• We will not, and we must not, rest until every person of every race believes in the promise of America because they see it in their own eyes, with their own eyes, and they live it and feel it in their own lives.

Burned By Remark, Lott Apologizes

It began Thursday, when Lott showed up at Sen. Strom Thurmond's 100th birthday party to praise the retiring symbol of Southern conservatism. To the amazement of many, Lott lauded Thurmond's 1948 presidential campaign, which won 39 electoral votes from Southern states, including Mississippi, with a virulently segregationist message.

Lott said: "I want to say this about my state: When Strom Thurmond ran for president, we voted for him. We're proud of it. And if the rest of the country had followed our lead, we wouldn't have had all these problems over all these years, either...."

In a statement Monday, Lott said: "...My comments were not an endorsement of his positions of over 50 years ago, but of the man and his life."

Donated Toys End Up On Store Shelves

[Sterling, CO] "I've been keeping an eye on that box every time I went to Wal-Mart, and was so excited as it slowly began to fill. Over the weekend I heard that it was nearly full, so I went to pick it up. I was devastated when I found it empty," [Toys for Tots organizer] Kraich said. Kraich said she complained to store management, but was told the store would only replace the items she knew for a fact were in the box. She was only able to replace three toys.

Wal-Mart manager Brad Barritt said the Toys for Tots organizer he met, whose name he could not remember, was instructed that donated items needed to be wrapped in Wal-Mart bags to ensure the items had been purchased. Kraich, who works for First America Cash Advance, denied ever receiving any such instruction.

Ex-Cheerleader Coach Gets 15 Years For Sex Trip

[Pittsburgh, PA] A cheerleading coach was sentenced Thursday to 15 years in prison for taking teenagers overseas to have sex with them.... Hayward, former owner of Pennsylvania Cheerleading Center Inc., went to London in April 2000 with six teens and allegedly told them that they would compete in a cheering competition, but that never happened....

Before leaving the country, Hayward assured the teens' parents that "if you raised your kids right, there won't be any problems" on the trip.

Wife Speeds Off With Naked Man On Car Roof

Debbie DeMarco was driving west on Naamans Road about 4:30 a.m. Monday when she said a blue Volkswagen Jetta roared past her with a naked man clinging to the roof. DeMarco, a paper carrier for The News Journal, said the car was swerving from left to right across the median, sparks flying. The driver then crossed back over the median toward DeMarco before making a sharp turn onto northbound I-95 near the Tri-State Mall....

Michael Becker told police he was trying to stop his estranged wife from stealing the car from his driveway when she took off with him hanging onto the side...